monicam

Blog CPR

I was planning on killing off this blog when all of a sudden there's a charge on my credit card bill for the next year's service fee. Shit. Late again.  And I just reviewed the cancellation terms... seems I can't get a refund for this year's fee if I cancel it now. I'm betting this will happen all over again next year but what the hell. Maybe it's time I revived this blog, sporadic as my blogging habit may be.

I should really move to a free blog provider. I hate this. I'm trapped. Damn you TypePad.

Gadamnit.

I just found out that this blog is fully paid for until the end of the year... Shit. There's no use moving it since I just found out how much of a pain it will be to move all the pictures to flickr. Oh well. I'll stick to this one until November 2006 then.  I just have to remember to cancel it before they charge me for 2007...  Okay just forget about the other site for now... ack. 

I'm thinking of moving...

I started this blog almost 2 years ago.  It was an attempt to document my latest stab at studenthood.  I've only posted about 85 times.  Since I'm not what you'd call an avid blogger, I thought it would be best if I just moved to a free service.  So this will be my last post and I'll be moving all the content of this blog to http://dmonica.wordpress.com.  In the new blog I'll try to be a bit more active with my posting schedule and hopefully I'll have more things to talk about since I'll be out of school by May. Yey! 

To the four people who read this blog... please update your bookmarks :)

Lunch road trip.

A month ago we had lunch in Tagaytay at our professor's house.  It's weird how you feel very much like a kid when you're with teachers.  Or maybe it was because he had toys.`

The worst is over.

I got through the most stressful day of my life aka defense day last week.  It was ok.  It wasn't as bad as I expected.  My advisers chewed my ass off for my obviously crammed paper but at least they liked my topic.  I'm trying to block out all the embarrassing little moments and focus on the positive.  I'll be graduating on time.  That's the important thing.  I have a shitload of revisions to do, but at least now I know that I'll be able to finish it. 

I have roughly 3 weeks of schoolwork left, minus holy week... that's only about 10 days of classes.  I still have three big group presentations to get through but they now seem puny and easy-peasy compared to what I've been through the past 2 years.  No sweat. 

It's amazing how much thicker my skin has become.  I used to be terrified of doing presentations.  What if we got it all wrong? What if the class gets bored? What if they ask a question that I can't answer? What if I say something stupid? What if the professor thinks we're dumb?  Well so what?  We've gotten so used to it that we usually just assign slides a minute before class and say fuck it, let's wing it.

The nostalgia is starting to kick in.  Two years?! It's over?! Parang bitin.  Parang kulang.  Now I DON'T want to graduate yet.  I don't want to face the world yet.  School has become such a comfortable place.  What do I do now?

Thankfully my fears have been soothed a bit.  I received my first job offer 2 days ago.  At least now I know I have something to fall back on.  And it's actually a pretty good fallback.  Big company just starting out here.  Interesting work, opportunity for growth and all that jazz. 

Now the big decision is do I join them or do I buck up the courage to venture out on my own.  Okay technically not on my own but with a good friend.  Do I accept this job, get more experience, learn the ropes, blah blah blah.  Or do I take the plunge, the big risk, the uncertainty, the promise of bigger rewards and personal fulfillment, etc. etc. 

Eh... we'll see.  Right now I'll just take it a day at a time. 
Day 1: finish my thesis revisions. 

Things to do this year.

Instead of writing my thesis, I came up with a list of things I should accomplish this year.  I love lists.  They make me feel organized and in control :)  This year I will...

1. Learn a new language.  Don't laugh. I'm serious.

2. Keep abreast of science news. Podcasts are great.  The Naked Scientist. Download it now. 

3. Play more golf.  Work at getting a decent handicap.

4. Quit smoking.  On May 23.

5. Eat healthier.  Less meat, more greens.

6. Exercise more.  Maximize the returns on that gym membership fee.

7. Read the newspaper regularly.  Ignorance is not bliss.

8. Stop buying things that I don't need.  Like more shoes and earrings.

9. Quit fast food.  Or at least limit my trips to McDonald's and Jollibee to once a month.

10. Seriously save money.  I'm turning 26 and am flat broke.

2006 will be the year I "get my act together".  Good luck nalang sayo... sus!

Eternally damned, or so they say.

This morning in class we talked about Felix Manalo and the Iglesia ni Cristo... It was quite interesting because it made me realize how extremely clueless I am about the different religions around me.  El Shaddai, Mormons, Presbyterians, Muslims, Born-again Christians, Methodists, INC, Seventh Day Adventists... I should know more about these things.

I grew up a Catholic just because everybody around me was.  I guess you can call it peer pressure.  In this part of the country, anybody who's not religious gets automatically tagged Catholic.  My parents are non-practicing Catholics.  The only time my family goes to church now is whenever there's a wedding or a funeral. 

I guess I'm what you would call a Catholic by convenience.  It's wrong and I know it's disrespectful to those who truly are, but most people just make it so hard for you to not be Catholic.  It would be near impossible to try to explain that you have no religion.  A family friend once commented on somebody's marriage and said "Eh hindi naman talaga sila kasal eh... sa huwes lang..."  I can't count how many times I've heard the words "Ay... hindi sya Katoliko?" as if it's the most despicable thing in the world.  What.the.fuck.  I hate it.  Some people just make it impossible for you to like them.

Don't get me wrong, I don't hate religious people.  I just want people to leave my beliefs alone.  You may think that I'm doomed to eternal damnation, but I don't agree with you. Deal with it.

Anyway... I don't want to get into a long rant about my feelings about the Catholic majority.

Here's another long overdue photo post... To welcome the new year and bid bon voyage to one of our beloved Zen garden regulars, we had a little get-together at Kuya's place in Paranaque.

Congratulations groupmate!

Ryx's wedding pictures!

Thesis terror.

I have 16 days before my (preliminary) thesis deadline.  Preliminary meaning it's not really the deadliest deadline.  I need to submit a "complete" document on March 6... sort of like a full first draft.  The gods of graduation will then have the power to declare that disaster either defendable or detestable.  If they think your work is sub-par, you are left in limbo... you pray for a miracle and try to squeeze a decent paper out of your craphole before graduation day.  Revise the shit out of that stinker until your brain bleeds out of your ears.  If and when I get my defendable rating, I can then proceed directly to "the best and worst day of my life".  The worst because just the thought of my thesis defense presentation makes me all glassy-eyed, knock-kneed, shit-my-pants terrified.  The best because in the event that I get past that horrible experience without crying (I hear they've made grown men cry buckets), I'll finally be able to say fuck you <insert name of institution here>.

It's such a pain.  They should've given us an option to just take more elective units.  Honestly, this whole thesis thing is bullshit  I'd much rather sit my ass in class 8 hours a day for a whole year than go through this torture.  I'd rather prepare a presentation every night than use the word strategy in a sentence again.  I'd rather get cold-called in every single class than conduct another lame-ass survey.  Oh please please please don't make me do it. 

Diwali and Xmas 2005

2005 was the banner year for getting drunk at school parties.

Diwali - Indian Festival of Lights.

The Christmas party at school was also fun.  Unfortunately, not a lot of people were able to be there because some of them had exams and the first year students were already on vacation... after their first semester, they understandably wanted to be as far away from the school as possible.